Attract and Keep an Awesome Lover!

‎"The ones who are responsible for our smiles are also the reasons behind our tears." –Ankush Modawal

Alright, if you are like most people, you would know that 2011 wasn’t the best year for relationships. 

Just too many shitty things happened and no matter how positive you became, forgave or tried to move on, it fuckin’ hurt!

So what went wrong? And it’s safe to say, again? Why do the same things happen with different people repeatedly? Why do we find ourselves in the same situations more than once?

Well, if you think that the other person in your life turned out to be an asshole or a bitch, it might be very true, but have you ever asked yourself as to why you keep meeting these kind of people?

After I had my own string of crappy relationships, I began to ask myself a question that every person on this Earth has asked themselves, “What is wrong with me?”

I used to see people who were so happy with their partners and to be honest, I was jealous, angry and felt sorry for myself. It made me feel like shit and I blamed God for it.

Why does that ugly dude have such an awesome girl like her? Or how did that old hag get to meet such a great guy like him? How come those who don’t ‘deserve’ get all the good in life? Why is it that those who struggle and work hard get crap?

The answer might come as a shock. It was shocking for me at least and when I realized how logical it all was, a sense of great freedom and security swept over me.

The answer is Self Love.

How much do you love and accept yourself in your own eyes? At the first glance, you might think that you love and accept yourself a lot, but look deeper.

As we grow old, we tend to accumulate more hurtful feelings, negative emotions and memories that devastated us. Like most, you might think that it’s all in the past, but what we don’t know is the fact that you really have to release those feelings consciously.

Unless they are released consciously, they form a part of your subconscious conditioning and you carry that invisible emotional baggage with you wherever you go. Now what this invisible baggage does is manifest visible crap everywhere you go!

Crap here, crap there, everywhere crap crap!

You might be visiting the most happening places but you will feel like crap. You might be surrounded with friends and you might feel very alone. You might feel as active as a sloth on a lazy day!

Guess what, if you feel burdened, you have baggage!

“It might be your partner’s fault but it’s your responsibility.” –Ankush Modawal

What I have come to realize is that love can only happen between equals. They have to be equals of loving themselves. Love and a relationship is all about the self image you have of yourself.

People manifest/come in your life as a result of what you feel and who you are at the present moment. The love you get from your partner is just a reflection/manifestation of the love you have for yourself.

Remember that even when you break up, it is for one reason; your intentions for yourself don’t match the intentions of your partner.

“Life is friendly and God is your best friend.” –Ankush Modawal

You will always meet the people you require at that present moment to become more of yourself.

The most important person in a relationship is you. The relationship you have with yourself is the kind of relationship you will have with your partner. The times in your life when you feel whole and happy is the time when everything flows right?

Love is meant to make you feel happy, free and alive! Anything else that you feel is not love and a very perverted view of what people think love is.

Reality check: If you were your ideal version, you wouldn’t be worrying over the loser asshole you are currently crying over. Guys, your ideal version would not be brooding over the girl who broke your heart.

Fuck all of that shit! 

I'm telling you man, LET GO, and LET GOD. There will be a few people in your life that you just have to shut out because unless they are there, they will keep on reminding you of the shit you don't want to think about. 

There is no good way to do this because it hurts to do something so drastic but if you don’t do it, you will keep on hurting yourself and life will really manifest a cruel situation for you. A situation that would be a lot more emotionally challenging for you to come out of and even more difficult to deal with. That's the way this Universe works!

“The relationship you have with your partner is just a reflection of how much love and understanding you have for yourself.” –Ankush Modawal

When you love yourself enough and let go of the baggage, the new partner in your life will come. It will all happen by chance and it will feel like a dream. So be ready and give yourself permission to move on, if your current relationship with your partner has been less than awesome for a long time. And as Barney Stinson says, it's gonna be Legen, wait for it, dary!

P.S: I know it sounds like a cliché but to understand these concepts better, you must definitely read my Black Books.

P.P.S: Make 2012 the best year for yourself, no one else is going do it for you. Otherwise at the end of 2012, you will just convince yourself once again that 2012 was not your year and 2013 will be better. The Truth is every day is the beginning of a new page of the book called your life.

P.P.P.S: I know the truth can be a bit shocking, in your face and you might hate me right now, but I just don’t sweet talk all the time. I believe that  if you sugarcoat a piece of turd, it won’t become better. My Goodshit is supposed to be hard hitting, as always! I hope this blog entry moves you to action and spanks you out of your trance!*Winks*

P.P.P.P.S: You know I love you!

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15 Commandments & Resolutions for a Rich Life

#1) I will say yes to more things that feel good and ignore negative things, people, situations and places that make me feel like shit.

#2) I will hang out more with people that I want to become like and avoid like radioactive camel dung, those who don’t have the same intention as I do.

#3) I will read more, and take even greater amount of time for self development to become wiser and less of a wiseass.

#4) I will love the people in my life like crazy, listen to them and understand their feelings, as if I am their shrink and was being paid a million dollars to do that.

#5) I will earn/attract more money this year than ever because I can do it, I am awesome and I love BMF (Blowin’ Money Fast).

#6) I will put the things I know to practice because knowledge that is not applied is as useful as a rusty old lock without a key.

#7) I will follow my intuition and feelings more because other people lie all the time but my heart on the left is always right.

#8) I will celebrate more and worry less, knowing fully that the Universe has its eyes on me like Bigg Boss and I am Sunny Leone.

#9) I will give more money, love, attention, time, care and energy to charities, animals and people who need what I have to give because I am a human being and I am humane.

#10) I will be even more open and allowing of miracles to happen in my life and I will avoid self sabotage as much as I can realize the times when I am digging my own grave.  

#11) I will keep my surroundings neat and clean, as orderly and up to date as possible because my outside world is a reflection of what’s going on in my mind, and last year, it was completely f’ed up.

#12) I will cry as softly as possible and laugh as loudly as I can.

#13) I will ‘invest’ more quiet time being alone rather than spend it on meaningless gossip, bitching or trash talking.

#14) I will dream with my eyes wide open and when I am sleeping, I will sleep like a baby and when I am awake, I will live my day like a lion/lioness.

#15) I will be grateful for what I have instead of asking God for more because when I appreciate what I have, that’s how I manifest more good  in my life.

P.S: A very merry X-Mas and a Happy New Year to you and your family. I love you.

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Why does this always happen to me? Self sabotage and why your life is always fucked up!

“If you cannot be your own best friend, you are bound to become your worst enemy.” –Ankush Modawal

History repeats itself if we don’t learn from the mistakes we have suffered from in our past. Time and again, in my life I used to observe a pattern.

Things repeated themselves in form of bad luck or ill-fate, or when my time was ‘good,’ a string of events would happen that would unfold fortunate circumstances for me.

Victory or defeat always happens in streaks and I used to wonder about this phenomenon a lot. Also, at some point of time or not, even after years, I would find myself in the same situation where I had been before.

Month after month, in spite of trying and working my ass off towards what I wanted, I was still stuck at the same spot I had started at.

Or maybe in some more horrible instances, I was given the ‘illusion’ of moving forward. But Karma is a bitch and this thing called good luck in my life was as elusive of me as a fart in a storm! It seemed to me as if happiness came at a price, I was happy for some time and then something happened that just messed everything up again! There was a lot of back and forth emotional activity, but I wasn’t getting anywhere in my life, I was stuck.

But until I discovered the root cause of all my miseries, this life still gave me a lot of ‘tough love’ and I was FORCED by the hand of destiny to change my life.

If you have been in a relationship and if you have had your heart broken, you would find that in a very short period of time, you find yourself in a similar kind of situation where your heart will be broken again!

If your financial situation is screwed up right now, chances are they have always been screwed up, or at least for the most part of your life. This wasn’t the first month you just got by through your expenses for this month, it has been like that for every month.

I always used to point a finger at other people and blamed them for everything ‘bad’ that happened in my life. Until the day I had to swallow a very bitter pill, I realized that I should’ve been pointing a finger at myself all along. Every time something bad happened, I was the 1st person, so I must be a suspect in my crimes!

Here are the Top 5 ways people shoot themselves in the foot:

#1: Ignoring your intuition: The number one reason for self sabotage is ignoring what you know within your heart. The heart on the left is always right. People might lie or tell you what you want to hear but base all your decisions on the way you feel. If you have a strong and developed intuition, you would be able to read into a person’s words no matter what they tell you. Although it sucks when people who you care about lie, even if they do, you would know.

#2: Having the wrong people: The 2^nd most important and top reason for your life to be completely fucked up is associating, hanging out or even maintaining contact with the wrong people. In my opinion, this has been the top reason in my life and in the life of others. Consciousness is ever flowing and when you exchange words, you exchange more than just ideas. If you have come across a lot of people who held the wrong intentions for you, believe me or not, you will be screwed. I was too and it’s not a good feeling.

#3: Losing out on good people: Don’t just think that you are right at all times. There are people who hold good intentions for you as well. You might have been a pain in the ass to live with and yet, someone who might have loved you a lot must’ve stuck by your side no matter the emotional pain you have caused them. But there might come a time when they will just give up, move on and let you be your own worst enemy. Again, if you believe yourself to be a righteous, pompous and selfish bitch/bastard, think again before you lose out on the people who care about you the most.  

“When you are headed on the wrong path you just cannot have the right people travel with you because they would have tried to stop you right where you started.” –Ankush Modawal

#4: Not taking the signs of the Universe: What is life trying to tell you? Have you been postponing a decision that you have been wanting to take for long? What are you being guided towards and are still not going there?

#5: Not reading my books: LOL, just kiddin’ but at some levels I am serious. Alright, here is the real number 5^th reason. You know what the greatest challenge for me has been?

“The greatest challenge for me has been to try and help people who didn’t want to help themselves.” –Ankush Modawal

#5: Waiting until the last moment until the pain becomes unbearable: In my life, I have come across and interacted with thousands of people. From my experience, I have come to the conclusion that unless people hit rock bottom and come to a point in life where their pain is too great to handle, they won’t do shit about how they live. Most wait until the very last minute to do what they should’ve done a long time before. Some people just contact me as if I am some sort of an agony aunt!

They write really loooooong mails to me bitching about the unfairness of life and how they find themselves in the same situations again and again. I am humble to all of them and tell them the 3 magical words that make everyone’s life so wonderful, “Read my books!”

And on the other hand, there are really smart people who don’t even need to read my books and guess what, they hang onto every word I say, are the first ones to order my books as soon as I release them and make an honest effort to stay updated as to whatever is happening in my life. 

I even tell them on their face that they don’t need to read my books, they know so much already! And they tell me the minute we think of ourselves as know it alls, we are as good as dead!

WOW! This is the kind of stuff that inspires me to write every day. To share my daily discoveries with as many people I can.

The paradox of life prevails, those who need to read my books the most read the least and the people who need to read my books the least read them the most. Let me tell you one thing, if you are reading my words, there is definitely a message here for you. Whatever that message is, only you can figure it out.

“It’s not in my nature to judge people, in my opinion, people judge themselves on the basis of the perception they think others hold of them.” –Ankush Modawal

I have just shared a few ideas and a bit of my experiences with you here. I cannot force you to do the right thing or make decisions for you, I am just your well-wisher hoping you would do the best for yourself and separate yourself from the herd mentality.

“You are the only one who can set yourself free.” –Ankush Modawal

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I am busy doing nothing; The Art of Chilling and Peace-ing out!

Alright, the dream has manifested. The goal I set for myself is complete. After releasing Blue Book on my birthday i.e 6^th October this year and Gold Book on 11.11.11, that makes it 5 books I’ve released in 3 years.

What now, now what?

Before I start off on another project or take on another business initiative, I thought to myself a very simple fact but a completely life changing truth.

"See since the time we are born, as soon as we learn to walk or mumble our first few words, we are put into a pre-school, then we go to junior school, then high school, then college, then a post graduation college, then we either do a string of jobs or if we are smart, we do business for ourselves. Let’s not forget that most of us get married, have kids and before we know it, our kids become the proverbial hamsters in this cycle of life." -Ankush Modawal

I realized that society and peer pressure makes ‘sitting idle’ or ‘doing nothing’ such an unwanted situation for most of us that it is nearly impossible to go against the normal conditioning or overcome the feeling of guilt that comes from being just a human ‘being’ and not a human doing!

If a person is without a job or is not doing any work or is ‘unemployed,’ he or she is looked down upon. As if that person ceases to be a normal human being and suddenly becomes a radioactive piece of shit!

I thought this fact to myself and realized that I have been working, writing, studying and grinding towards my dream for so long that I hardly had time to do anything for myself or others. I too was guilty of being a hamster, but not guilty of being an unproductive one.

So, finally, I made a decision very recently that I would do absolutely nothing except for chillin’ out and rejuvenating myself for the next level of success, wealth and abundance.

Only one problem, after years of working and writing, my lifestyle was crazily different to what I would plan to live for the near future. Also, let’s keep in mind the fact that since I have been working for so long, chillin’ out for whole days and weeks was an absolutely new experience for me.

Anyway, I had made up my mind that I would give my mind, body and soul a complete detox before I would start working or writing again.

“It’s only fair to give yourself a break, but at the same time, a break does not include anything that would break you!” –Ankush Modawal

I am not the type of a guy who likes gossip, neither the type of person who likes to be around negative people, situations or conditioning nor the type who would put my emotional, physical or spiritual strength in jeopardy over anything or anyone for long.

“Like the old saying goes, an idle mind is a Devil’s workshop. Damn, it’s not only his workshop, it’s a place where he eat, sleeps and shits too!” –Ankush Modawal

So how do I keep myself busy while doing nothing? How do I rejuvenate, replenish and recharge my energies? How do I stay focused while not focusing on my work? Here’s how!

The first thing is to realize that you do deserve this sweet ass of a time! Not only do you deserve it, you have earned it. Once you remove any signs of guilt from within your body, only then would you be able to truly cherish and ravish the moments that are yet to come. Your family, friends or other well meaning strangers might try to tell you to stop being idle, but ignore them. If you feel what you are doing in your heart is right, do it.

#1: Sleep

Do you realize how fucked up our fucked up sleep patterns have become? We have so much work to do that we have to take our cell phones to the loo so that we can reply to the texts that are pending while we are shitting? Hell, I know I did! Do yourself a favor and tell everyone you know that you are on a break. The world won’t end if you don’t pick up a call or reply to your texts immediately. Sleep like you used to when you were a baby.

#2: Read

Read the books you’ve been wanting for so long to read. Not the drama novels, crappy news or mindless magazines. I mean real stuff! The kind of things that would help you develop yourself and into an awesome personality!

If your home got hit by a giant meteorite and everything was destroyed, or if aliens abducted and brainwashed you or if you were stranded on a deserted island, read the following 4 books and in a very short time, you will become healthy, wealthy and happy!

a. The law of attraction: The basics of the teachings of Abraham by Esther and Jerry Hicks

Only two words for this, POWERFUL STUFF!

b. You can heal your life by Louise Hay

Find out how certain type of thought patterns manifest as diseases in the body.

c. Black Books (Part One and II) by Ankush Modawal (Yours Truly!) I recommend this books for anyone trying to find the answers behind life. The Black Books will really blow your mind away!

d. Gold Book; Golden rules of the rich and famous for manifesting money by Ankush Modawal (Yours Truly, yet again!)

This book if for anyone who wants to understand the energy behind money and wants to manifest more wealth within their lives. The hardest thing about getting money is to realize that it's easy.

I sound like a Hedonist right now telling you to read my books myself, but this brings me conveniently to my next point.  

#3: Write

I started writing because it was really therapeutic, that’s why I have blatantly mentioned my books in the above list. Writing is something that transformed my life completely and how I got to know myself. It became my profession because it became my passion first. 

All my books have helped countless people really figure out what life is all about and how to really be able to live the life of their dreams.

Also, there are things you feel that you cannot express to others because either people don’t give a damn, don’t exist or are not there for you.

So, what started as my emotional catharsis, ravings and rants, became my full time profession. Now people pay me to write my thoughts. That’s the power of dreams baby!

#4: Breathe

What the Hell is this, you might say? I don’t have to breathe, my body does it for me! But know this that when you breathe consciously, you become conscious of life itself. For a few minutes in a day, breathe deliberately. Like the saying goes, “Take a breather.”

#5: Clean

It is said that we all are one with everything. That includes our environment as well so when we clean our surroundings, we are clearing our own limiting beliefs thus enabling ourselves to create a haven in which we can completely and totally relax. Keep things to a minimum and surround yourself with the best quality things you can.

#6: Solitude

Switch off your cell phone. Sit in a room alone in silence. Do absolutely nothing except for just sitting or lying down. THINK and most importantly, LISTEN!

“In the daily hustle bustle of life, the scream of our ego becomes so loud that we cannot hear the whisper of our intuition.” –Ankush Modawal

If you are the type of person who doesn’t like being alone in your own company, you might have long standing issues which need to be sorted out.

We live in a time when most of the people of society are spiritually divorced from their own self. Life has never moved so fast but we all must slow down and realize that life’s not the destination, it’s the journey.

And if you realized something, there is still a lot to do even when you want to do nothing and replenish, recharge and rejuvenate yourself! What do you do to chill out?

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(18+) This is some serious shit!

“Knowledge is a kind of power that increases when it is shared and gets diminished when hoarded.” –Ankush Modawal

Alright, I must confess that I have never written a blog twice a month ever since I started writing in my life!

But I am shocked and angry as a hungry T-Rex right now! 2665 people in my group and not a single soul bothered to act on what I said? This is the first time I am voicing out my negativity publically; this just goes to show the seriousness of the situation I feel within.

Every day, I get hundred of emails from people asking me to pray for them, for thanking me for daily doses of inspiration, telling me how wonderful their lives have become after reading my books and some other weird stuff also!

But what good is all this shit if you don’t share your good with someone?

If you don’t know what I so am pissed about, here’s a picture. As they say, a picture is worth a thousand words.

Just imagine if I stop writing or sharing whatever I write with my readers? I have no idea how much of my writings have affected your life. I might not even know who you are personally, but I would like to believe that we are all interconnected with one another.

That’s why every single day for almost 2 years, I write and update my facebook profile, Like page and Group with some quote that would act as some sort of an inspiration for those who read it. For 2 years, people haven’t stopped telling me how much they love me, how much they admire or how much they enjoy reading what I write.

I just do it for the fun of it and to help make this world a better place because I think that this whole fuckin’ planet that we live on is my home and every person is my family!

I could also live with an idea that most people live with and that is that most people are out to get me and that this world is a horrible place. If I did live with that idea, I wouldn’t do a single shit and absolutely not disclose the secrets of success! Absolutely not for free and that too typed out neatly as quotes! But what good am I or my writings if they are just hoarded or not shared?

I mean, just imagine, I have a choice to absolutely not share whatever I know and just use it to my advantage. If I would stop giving a fuck about making this world a better place and not distributing free content all over the fuckin’ internet?

I didn’t do that.

That’s where the problem lies in the thinking of most people.

They just want something while giving nothing for it. People have just forgotten how it was to be down and out. Well, I haven't and that's why, I did not stop writing consistently for you. I still haven't but seriously, right at this moment, I feel cheated by all the people I have helped who did not do a single thing to help their fellow friends in whatever way I wished they would.

There is a method to my madness and while I don’t doubt my talent or abilities. If you are seriously serious about making this world a better place, grow a spine and start doing good wherever you see the opportunity to do so.

If you can bloody sit online for hours, chat away mindlessly bitching about life to your friend so I presume that you can take a moment and share whatever shit I write everyday for you with a loved one or two.

“I do my part. I share whatever I know about success and take this job of writing something every day for you people very seriously. I would like to think of it as the morning newspaper, the day it doesn’t come, you miss it.” –Ankush Modawal

I don’t wish to keep on writing for the same bunch of people in our group, this is your group as much as it is mine. Just like you take every opportunity to improve your life, I would appreciate it if you would take as much opportunity to improve the lives of others around you, or at least try honestly.

If we don’t, what good are we and what kind of a fucked up world would we be a part of?

I feel a lot of anger right now because if you people are serious about everything being one energy field and the idea of being ONE, then how can you not act on these kinds of situations?

Moreover, I just wish you realized that when you help someone, you only end up helping yourself.

Last but not the least, I would like to thank Shannon who I think is an angel is disguise for finding me at the right moment right at the moment I was blowing off my mental lid. She was the first and only person to do something about what was mentioned in my group post. I didn’t know her until this morning but it just goes to show the power of the Universe.

“Great people DO exist in this world, but you only find them when you yourself become one.” –Ankush Modawal

This blog entry is a lot less meaner and simmered down as compared to as it would’ve been if it wasn’t for her.

If throughout this catharsis and ramblings, I made any sense to you, please do the needful as it was mentioned in the facebook group post.

Here is the link to it,

https://www.facebook.com/groups/ankushmodawal/

If not, then seriously, I have no others words.

P.S: I really appreciate the people that have supported me and I love you all unconditionally.

P.P.S: This blog entry is for those ‘victims’ and ‘energy vampires’ who are selfish, uncaring and thoughtless of others.   

P.P.P.S: Damn, I feel so peaceful now!

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